


farewell contemplation

by clae



Category: God Eater (Video Games), God Eater 2
Genre: Gen, Not Beta Read, a bit of Julius/FeMC if you squint
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-28
Updated: 2017-03-28
Packaged: 2018-10-12 04:02:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 741
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10481634
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clae/pseuds/clae
Summary: [GE2/GE2RB] He holds dear his comrades - hisfriends- more than anything else. Which is why he understands that he needs to let them go.(Spoilers for ending of GE2's main story)





	

**Author's Note:**

> Obligatory word vomit now that I have (re)finished God Eater 2's main story. Julius-centric. Needless to say, spoilers.
> 
> Female protagonist's name is "Irisca", by the way.

  
Julius Visconti would like to think himself as a selfless person.

He could still remember one of those days when the red rain fell, when a certain God Eater he was (and is) deeply fond of could've died from piloting the God Arc Soldier without preparation. Because Ciel nearly died thanks to that _son of a bitch_ Director of theirs. The thought of losing them was so terrifying that he could only let out a bitter - almost mocking - laugh when that old lump informed him that he had to take responsibility for his then-Vice Captain's actions.

The punishment was worth it. Irisca was fine, solitary confinement aside. Ciel was fine - _better_ , even. He should've been glad, and really, he was.

However, the knowledge that either of them nearly died continued to haunt him. What if Irisca had arrived too late? What if she turned out to be incompatible with the Soldier? What if more God Eaters had to lose their lives senselessly in the name of the supposedly safer method of fighting against the Aragami? What if, _what if_...

So when Romeo died and Dr. Rachel offered to him the prospect of continuing the unmanned God Arc Soldiers, Julius readily jumped the gun. If it meant no one had to die anymore _(not Irisca, not Ciel, not Nana and Gilbert, not the Far East Branch people--)_ , then the subsequent loneliness he had to endure from knowing no one else but him could do it was a small price he didn't mind paying.

 

However, deep down, he also knew that his actions had been nothing but selfish.

No, he wouldn't say that his desire to protect people had been a lie; would he go so far to torture himself like this if it had been true? However, seeing how much trouble Blood had gone through just to be here in this void - just to haul him back _home_ -, he couldn't help but to ask himself: why was he so afraid at the thought of them getting hurt? What made him stubbornly chose to endure all of this - even atoning his sins in this accursed place - by himself?

Romeo didn't sacrifice his life only for him to throw it away in a futile attempt to redeem himself. Irisca didn't take the burden of becoming the captain of their unit only for him to betray the faith she had placed on him. If that was not selfish, then Julius didn't know what it was.

Could it be that he had been nothing but trying to run away? To escape the guilt over his failure, masked as the futile attempt at a second chance to make things right?

If that was the case, then he was not surprised if this was the price he had to pay - to be so close yet eternally out of reach from his comrades. He had to, because otherwise the rest of Blood would have to in his place.

* * *

 

Julius couldn't ask for friends any more loyal than his Blood comrades, and he was eternally grateful for that.

However, it hurt. It hurt, knowing how willing they were to follow him to the hell of this never-ending battle. Knowing they were willing to abandon everything, because Blood was supposed to be a family. And they wouldn't leave their family members behind.

If he could be selfish once more, he would love nothing but to be with them again - truly, he wanted to. Yet, didn't he get himself into this mess because he wanted to protect them in the first place? And failed _miserably_ , at that.

 

So this time, he had to let them go. It was the least he could do to start making things right; it would've undone everything they had worked so hard for otherwise.

 

He caressed the barrier between them, letting his will projected to the boundary that shall forever remind him of his punishment. From beyond the invisible wall, Irisca reached out to him, holding back her own tears as she silently reassured him that they would carry his will for certain.

Julius smiled for the last time in gratitude before turning away for his final battle. Briefly, he glanced back as he made his way to the shadow of the Marduk before him.

She was not alone. Ciel was there. Nana was there. Yuno was there. Gilbert was there.

Blood was in safe hands. His family was in safe hands.

It was enough for him.


End file.
